I enjoyed listening to the audiobook of Dear Bi Men: A Black Man’s Perspective on Power, Consent, Breaking Down Binaries, and Combating Erasure, read by the author, J.R. Yussuf.
This book was incredibly validating and informative. As a reader of memoir and nonfiction, I appreciate that the author presents himself as an imperfect protagonist who’s still figuring things out.
What stood out to me most were the discussions on bi-phobia and bi-erasure; more specifically, how empathy tends to be withheld from bi+ folx, because society at large seems hellbent on making people “pick a side.”
Other topics covered include toxic masculinity, patriarchy, consent, porn (if you’re gonna use it, pay for it), the inadequacies of sex ed in the US, stigma, and therapy (it’s not your responsibility to train your
therapist to be culturally competent).
Noteworthy Quotes:
- “Shoutout to SpongeBob, who’s asexual.”
- “Television is not the only source of learning.”
- “Contracting an STI or HIV is a reality of being a sexually active adult. And it does not have to mean anything about who you are at your core.”
- “Outing culture leads to murder.”
- “Some people don’t realize they’re bisexual+ until much later in life. “
- “Being bisexual+ is about your desire, not your history.”
Conclusion
I highly recommend this book and I’m already using it as part of bibliotherapy with some clients.
Thanks for reading!
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